2005-07-02
Health Club Etiquette
I'm in my health club whirlpool and in to join me from the locker room comes this sweaty guy straight from changing out of his workout clothes. He sits himself down within eyeshot of a sign that says - "SHOWER POLICY, Please shower before entering the swimming pool, whirlpool, sauna, and dry heat room." So what do I do?
- A) Ignore him. Everybody knows that whirlpools are no better than toilets anyway.
- B) Say, "Yuck" and quickly exit the pool.
- C) Look directly at him then look directly at the sign, making sure that he notices me.
- D) Report him to the club staff.
- E) After he dips his head in the pool I say, "I wouldn't put my head underwater here, some people don't shower before entering this pool.
- F) Tell him, "Uh, maybe you didn't notice but it's club policy to shower before entering the pools."
- G) Look him directly in the eye and say, "Look pal, I don't pay my hard earned dues at this club to soak in a swirl of your sweaty rancid body sluffoff."
- H) Threaten him with, "Hey. If I ever see you again enter this pool, or for that matter any pool, without first showering, me and my buddies are going to drag your sorry #ss to the showers and demonstrate how to scrub a scumbag clean with brillo. Do I make myself clear?"
- I) Just go berserk and drown the vile rat.
- J) Strike up a conversation with him, befriend him, and then try to sell him Amway stuff.
